It's all about consent. Say it with me, nice and slow: con-sent. Even the most extreme actions are still completely ethical, if that magic ingredient of consent is present. Likewise, without consent, even sweet, vanilla sex is unethical assault without it.
My personal boundaries are perhaps a little broader than most. I live for edge play, pushing limits, pretending to fight back. But I believe kink is neither inherently ethical nor inherently unethical. Like any other action, it's all about the people involved.
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